Last Action Hero - 3 minute opinion

Four minute opinion about Last Action Hero on Game Boy

Last Action Hero

Last Action Hero on original Game Boy is an action game from 1992. The game is based on Arnold Schwarzenegger's action-comedy Last Action Hero. The game's box art is exactly the same as the movie poster. But this 9 stage game itself is a big failure as the most of movie based franchises. Let's see why.

Everything starts from confusing game introduction from game developer Bits Studios. They say: "Last Action Hero blasts you out of the real world - onto the silver screen - and back again, in a non-stop action adventure based on the epic fantasy feature starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. As movie hero Jack Slater, you'll team up with your biggest fan, Danny Madigan, who's got a magic movie ticket that's the ticket to serious trouble. Leaping between both the movie world and the real world with this magic ticket, you'll get into wild chases and deadly fights with the most dangerous criminals imaginable. Last Action Hero delivers all the excitement of the Schwarzenegger film with just one difference… you're the star! But this time, you must ultimately defeat the arch villains and ensure a happy ending."

If you read it carefully you see that only the last part of it is about the game. And it sounds like a lame excuse to ignore movie script and publish the game as it is. "... with just one difference… you're the star!"

It might have been a big disappointment for a young movie fan who gets Arnold Schwarzenegger's game but even cannot imagine he plays as Arnold because the game developer says it. That's weird: they promise us Schwarzenegger but at the same moment they don't. If I buy a game of Arnold Schwarzenegger I want to play as Arnold Schwarzenegger or at least as his character not as myself. Ironic is that the movie features Jack Slater and Arnold Schwarzenegger both played by Arnold Schwarzenegger himself but we get only a tiny movie poster on game box not the hero to control in the game.

The other flaw appears on game startup. There is no starting demo. You see start screen with Last Action Hero logo and quite a catchy tune but that's all. If you press Start button the game starts with Scene 1. Yes they have named stages as scenes.

Even if you have seen the movie you hardly get what's going on. The first level starts on the first level of a building. In the movie we see Jack Slater entering the building and next moment he is on the roof talking to The Slasher. But in the game you must pass through the building floors to get to the roof. That's OK.

It is a 2D platformer. The level is well designed and looks interesting. You have to run forward, catch all those floating papers that probably represent the Magic Ticket from the movie. When you have collected the given number of those papers you get the item that let you pass forward. The fire extinguisher for example.

When you meet the first enemy you see that the main reason why this game is so low rated. Fighting action is terribly painful in this game. And maybe this explains why you cannot play as Jack Slater and have to play as yourself. Because any armed bad guy is tougher, quicker and more armed than you. All you have is your fists and legs in whole the game. OK you get some weapons later but not for man to man fighting actions. You start with bare hands and have to run to the end with these. Missing weapon is not a big deal if you are tough fighter but you are not. Your character is slow and weak and the first enemy teaches you backward long jump that you see painfully lot in this level.

The other moodkiller is time limit. Every level have countdown timer. It wouldn't be a problem if fightings would be normal but no they are time eaters. Level also needs lot's of annoying jumping actions. Even if you manage to kill all bad guys you probably fall down and run out of time before the end of the level.

The level demands continuous training. And soon you discover that this at first catchy melancholic 15 second sound loop turns to earkiller because you have to listen it over and over.

But the sound effects are a lot worse. There are several sounds: beeping sound if you grab floating sheet of paper, susurrus sound of fire extinguisher and gunshots of enemies. But that's all. Every other actions are silent: your jumping, falling, getting shot and collapsing to death. Even loosing the game is without any sound effect at all.

There is no saving function or even password function. If you die hou have some continues and then you have to start over from the first level.

If you finally manage yourself to the end of the level the next scene starts on top of the building. The Slasher attacks you with liquid fire drooling stick. Yes, he used an ax in the movie. He is easy to win. Just punch him over the edge of roof.

The third scene is a top view of an extremely broken street. And you drive a car. Strategy is simple, just avoid holes, collect those magic tickets and bump into the other cars. Level itself is quite annoying. You must collect all 24 tickets. To make ticket collecting harder the copter starts bombing you. If you manage to collect all the tickets you get a thing witch purpose is unknown. It is impossible to figure out what the hell it might be. So it is 100% sure that at first time you fall into water when you reach to the end of the street. After endles retries I discovered that I must use the large knoll to jump, press B to speed up and then press A. Then car makes full spin on air and lands safely on the next shore.that looks like beach. Whatever this copter ambush 'n chase was I don't remember that from movie.

In the fourth scene you are running around again and collecting tickets. No enemies around. If you figure out that you must use time bomb near the edge of gap to shake down the floating platform this level is extremely easy to complete.

The fifth scene is a front side of a building with dozen elevators you have to use to jump towards to roof. Collect all tickets before time runs out. I remember some elevator action from movie. Even the elevator cabins look similar to the one in movie. In jumping if you make mistake you fall into silent death. Heroes don't scream. Finally you arrive to the ceiling and grab the last floating ticket to get a rocket launcher. Then a copter appears and starts shooting at you. Use your rockets like time bomb before. Seven rockets take it down. This level is quite enjoyable. Some bad guys would spice it up.

Scene six brings you back to the top view street again. This time you see a mini map on screen that shows you are chasing someone you never see. That's funny you have time limit inside time limit. Just speed up and ignore the tickets and holes. If you slow down you loose the target and your life.

Next scene takes you to the movie theater known from movie. The villains with baseball bats are easy to beat if you are accurate and fast. Run forward the roof and bash the bad guys. This level is fun enough to run through.

Then you are on the roof with The Slasher again. This time it is impossible to push him over the edge of roof. Also there are five useless tickets floating on the air that give you nothing. Whole the trick is to push The Slasher rightward until he falls to roof window. Follow him and jump to the last scene.

Down there The Slasher waits you and then jumps into the wall to turn into the giant face that blows boogers at you. I think it should represent the movie screen they used to run between movie and real world. Just avoid small boogers and kick back the bigger ones. Yes that is only time you need this useless slow and short kick. 12 kicks brakes the face and you see Jack Slater ... no this guy was yourself ... jumping through the wall. That's all. No ending demo. Just some titles.

For conclusion. This game would be fun to play if the enemies on the first level would be easier to beat. Their toughness combined with time limit kills whole the fun. Also the copter attack on the third level is too much because you have to avoid bombs and holes, collect tickets at the same time and also must be prepared to the jumping knoll thatalways appears too suddenly.

With Game Shark timer code the game is quite a fun. The overall graphics are good. There are variety in levels and gameplay that even tries to follow movie script sometimes. And I hardly found any glitches in the game. These even didn't affect playing. Game music is not bad but all the loops are too short. Sound effects are lame but at least not disturbing. Game intro and ending is not even bad because there is not any intro or demo and also no ending.

The only downside of the gameplay is a pseudo hardness caused by too short time limit. So don't try it without Game Shark because the first level just drives you nuts.

Mario's Picross - 4 minute opinion

Mario's Picross for original Game Boy is a puzzle game from 1995. This game features Mario as an archaeologist. He's chiseling away square tiles in grid to reveal hidden pictures on ancient walls. Picross is a simple and addictive puzzle game and the archaeologist Mario story fits here perfectly.

Basically the whole game is a collection of nonogram logic puzzles. You see a grid with numbers for every row and column. You know that these numbers refer to amount of hidden squares within the grid. And your task is to find all the squares the numbers refer to. If you uncover all the hidden ones the picture is revealed. For beginners there is also a great tutorial in the game. Spend some minutes to study Picross strategy and exciting gameplay is guaranteed.

The game rules are easy and you have 30 minutes for each puzzle but if you chisel a wrong tile you loose your valuable time and the game may end very soon. Ahem... and sometimes I hardly get the point of availability to clear those already chiseled correct tiles.

Even after competing the game it doesn't get boring because Mario's Picross keeps the track of your first time record, counts the trials, and your best time record. Finally the Time Trial challenges you. If you beat the time you can enter your name. At this time it is actually saved because Mario's Picross cartridge is battery backed.

Although the game is highly addictive unfortunatley back in the '95 the things didn't go so well. Due to the disappointing sales, Nintendo didn´t release the Game Boy sequel Mario's Picross 2 outside of Japan. Even ScrewAttack.com voted this game one of the worst Mario games.

I don't share the opinion that the game is boring and unplayable on original Game Boy screen. Not at all. Actually it feels perfect on it. The only thing to complain about is clearing saves. It is not very intuitive. You have to select saved game and then hold down A, B and Select buttons simultaneously. There is no menu option for clearing saves. But who would want to clear his records anyway.

The interesting thing is that there are some very funny contradictions in this game. The game introduction says that "for hundreds of years the Japanese have enjoyed playing picross", but in fact nonogram puzzle was invented in 1987 by professional Japanese puzzler named Tetsuya Nishio. So therefore by that time the Japanese had had a chance to enjoy picross only for 8 years... There are also many pictures that archaeologist Mario uncovers which are absolutely not related to ancient Egyptian pyramids or to Mayan like antartic penguin (8F), an ambulance car (8G) or backhoe (8H). Sometimes those uncovered tiny pictures hardly represent the items they're meant to. For example these oranges (7D) are more like two bruised potatoes and this bucket (7E) looks kind of creepy and this angel (7F) doesn't remind me angel at all. That's kind of funny.

Luckily the Nintendo DS title Picross DS features downloadable puzzles from the original game and other Nintendo-developed Picross titles. But the feeling of playing this old title on original Nintendo Game Boy is incomparable. Mario's Picross for Game Boy is another great game that never ages.

Tetris - One minute opinion

Tetris for original Game Boy is a great puzzle game and probably one of the most known video games in the World. At 1989 Nintendo did an excellent marketing decision to sell Tetris in bundle with brand new Game Boy set. Game is well known and almost everybody can play it. The learning curve is short and gameplay causes instant addiction. Game Boy's four-shade lime-green graphics makes it fresh even 19 years later. But on Game Boy Color the visuals are even better, amazingly clean and colorful. A friend with another Game Boy, Tetris cart and Link Cable doubles fun. For extra challenge there is also game mode where levels start with messy blocks. But the only minus is the lack of score table save function. What's the point of typing in player's name if it disappears on switch-off. Anyways it's a minor flaw and doesn't spoil gaming excitement at all. And if you're good you're rewarded with dancers and rocket launches. Tetris for Game Boy is great game that never ages.